Concerns about ABA often stem from outdated practices that emphasized compliance over meaningful skill development. Modern, ethical ABA is fundamentally different: it focuses on helping children build functional, autonomy-supporting skills while honoring their identity and natural ways of regulating.

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To ensure therapy is respectful, look for providers who prioritize communication, daily living skills, emotional regulation, and safety—not superficial behaviors like eye contact or suppressing harmless stimming. Providers should never attempt to make a child “appear less autistic.”

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High-quality ABA teams collaborate with families, adjust goals based on your values, and use reinforcement—not coercion—to build skills that truly improve quality of life.

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• Allowing a child to stim during work as long as it is safe and not interfering with learning.
• Prioritizing functional communication over forcing eye contact or specific body posture.